Monday, May 9, 2011

My Inner Pessimism

The list of things I can’t do gets longer every day. There are the obvious ones, like I can’t fly or be a super model. (I’m under 6 feet tall, I eat, and I’ve got human arms and legs...which explains the modeling part... not the flying part.) And there are frustrating things like not having the time or money to travel.

I suppose that I could take the high road and cheerfully describe exotic trips to my kitchen, my treks to the garage, my safari trips through the weeds of the back yard, and I could describe in great detail past archeological digs through the rooms of my kids. But I have decided instead to sulk because I'm lazy and it's easier.

As I age I am starting to have a deep appreciation for the philosophy of the pessimist. For example, let’s say you believe the glass IS half full… is it going to get any fuller? NO, and in all honesty, it will eventually just evaporate. However, if you believe it is half empty you may put some effort into replenishing it. See? The same can be said about the lemonade scenario. An optimist will attempt to make lemonade out of life's lemons. But when a pessimist is handed lemons they are more likely to start looking for the tequila and salt...which I now prefer over lemonade.

Okay, one more attempt to explain my new found pessimism... with a joke. Here goes: Today my optimism turned to pessimism when I spilt my “half-full” glass of wine and it stained the’s just that now I wish it had been half empty.

I'm just saying...


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